Puzzled About the Brains

Tuesday, July 12 2005

I spent the past twenty minutes doing some mild and slightly serious thinking about a subject that’s been nagging at me for far longer.

Examine the following graph. The outer edges, in red, represent a number of things, including: totally crazy, maniacal rage, utter depression, sheer stupidity, and just about every possible extreme of human emotion you can think of, “happy” on top and “dreadful” on the bottom. If you spend your days in the red regardless of polarity, you’re probably ill in one way or another.

The soothing pale, nearly white, green in the center is what most of us consider normal, not very emotional human behavior. Most people experience these kinds of feelings all the time (which makes them difficult to describe, as it turns out, because they’re not very exciting or flashy, they’re just normal).

The bands of darker green are the areas we either look forward to or dread. Going uphill means that maybe you’ve won the lottery, or got married, or had a baby. Going downhill means that perhaps someone died, or your favorite politician didn’t win the election.


Each individual line represents random people, except for one. Mine. Mine is the maroonish color, and that’s what has been disturbing me. I threw it together, of course, for purposes of explanation, but seriously – I typically ride right down the center of human emotions. Rarely every super extremely happy, and rarely ever super extremely sad. I have upturns for things like babies being born, and getting married, and accomplishing things, and some downturns for things like people dying, supreme exhaustion, etc., but never, and I do mean never, do I feel like I truly get emotional about anything.

So I’m moderately upset, and feeling like I’m not getting my money’s worth, and maybe I need to get my head examined to see if maybe there’s some kind of valve that’s clogged or something.