Sneeze With Bonus Surprise

Thursday, December 16 2004

As I was waiting for a flight yesterday a business man and his business man friend sat down a few seats away from me with Outback Steakhouse to go. The man removed the food from the largish brown paper bag and began to sneeze somewhat violently with the bag up to his face, the bag reverberating with each sneeze.

The third and final sneeze sounded a bit different then the rest, as it was also the moment he began to vomit into the same bag, somewhat noisily. A distinctive enough noise that others looked up from books and magazines to try and convince themselves that they had not heard what they just heard.

His business partner was obviously concerned and/or repulsed, but the barf bag man put him at ease by saying “this happens every time I sneeze.”

Maintaining my composure and not laughing like a hyena was super difficult to say the least. It didn’t help that he dug right into his take away steak without so much as a trip to the restroom to freshen up or even a quick rinse of the mouth. Three sneezes, puke, eat a steak.